Explore and Let Your Wild Side Out
Madi Murphy, PSYN's Cosmic Consultant
Did you know every zodiac season brings with it an invitation to step deeper into your most sensual, embodied self? Welcome to our new column, Sex and the Stars, where professional astrologer and founder of CosmicRx, Madi Murphy, will be sharing how to harness the astrological energy for sexual self care and how to add extra juiciness and joy to your daily life!
When it comes to sex, Sagittarius is definitely a free spirit. Sags firmly believe sex should happen anywhere, anyplace, anytime and anyway you and your partner like it. Sagittarius sex is fun, exciting, and playful. So, luckily, we all get to tap into these traits this time of year.
This is the season to try something new- experimenting with sexual techniques and toys can be both physically and intellectually satisfying. Sagittarius Season cosmic pleasure practices are all about having a good time and full of laughter and pleasure.
Sexual Passion: A Sacred Journey of Exploration
Sex is one of the most intimate and profound experiences we can have, and yet, how we experience it is as unique as we are. Seriously—what’s “normal” when it comes to sex? Is there even such a thing? We all vibe with the world differently, shaped by our own histories, preferences, and perspectives. So, let’s ditch the labels and embrace the fact that your sexual journey is yours and yours alone.
Dr. Justin Lehmiller, a leading sex educator and psychologist at Harvard, reminds us that our desires can vary wildly, from boots to bondage to, yes, even dirt (hey, we’re not here to judge). And while the reasons behind these desires might be complex, what truly matters is that you feel comfortable, safe, and, most importantly, consensual in your exploration.
If you’re into kinks or fetishes, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. Sexual passion is all about curiosity, exploration, and constantly pushing the boundaries of what excites you. Your desires are an expression of your true self, and you get to own them. So why not embrace them?
It’s all about staying open-minded and checking in with yourself and your partner. Communicating your fantasies, whatever they may be, can take your connection to a whole new level—leading to richer, more satisfying sex, and even better communication in the long run.
So, if you’re ready to explore your sexual self on a deeper level, here’s a little exercise to get you started.
Sexual Exploration Exercise: Reignite That Spark 🔥
Feeling like your sex life is stuck on repeat? If it’s starting to feel a little stale, trust me, you’re not the only one. It’s easy to fall into predictable routines, and sometimes, we end up just going through the motions without much thought. But guess what? Sex doesn’t have to be boring—it can be an adventure every single time!
One of the best ways to spice things up is by exploring your sexual boundaries together. But here’s the kicker: most couples never really talk about their boundaries. It’s not that they don’t want to—it’s just that these conversations don’t always come naturally. But trust me, getting open and vulnerable about what you like (and don’t like) can open the door to a whole new world of possibility. Plus, it builds trust, intimacy, and better communication skills.
So, kickstart that exploration with this fun exercise.
How to Explore Your Sexual Fantasies Together
Grab the list: Below, you'll find a list of sexual behaviors to explore. It’s not exhaustive (because let’s be real, there are infinite ways to get creative!), but it’s a good place to start.
Make two copies: You and your partner each take one, and get cozy—separate rooms are cool if you need some space for introspection. Now, go through the list and decide which activities you’re into. You can rate them like this:
Green (💚): "I am SO down to try this!"
Yellow (💛): "Might be into it—depends on the vibe!"
Red (❤️): "Definitely not my thing. Nope."
Come back together: Once you’ve each marked your list, sit down together (wine, candles, comfy vibes are encouraged) and talk it out. Discuss why you said yes to some and no to others. It’s not about judgment, it’s about understanding. Maybe some items will surprise you or spark deep, unexpected conversations.
Keep it chill and non-judgmental: Respect each other’s boundaries and desires. If your answers don’t match, that’s cool! Every person is on their own journey, and some of these talks might just bring you closer together. Stay open-minded and curious.
THE LIST
Watch porn together
Read erotic fiction together
Kiss a member of your same sex (if you’re straight), or of the opposite sex (if you’re gay)
Have sex in a public place
Have sex in a semi-public place, where no one can actually see you
Use a vibrator in front of your partner
Have your partner use a vibrator on you
Stimulate your partner’s anus with your fingers
Or mouth
Have your anus stimulated with fingers
Or mouth
Have anal sex
Have a threesome with someone of the same sex
Have a threesome with someone of the opposite sex
Have an orgy
Watch an orgy
Talk dirty with your partner
Perform oral sex
Receive oral sex
Allow your partner to dominate you
Dominate your partner
Spank your partner
Receive a spanking
Record yourself having sex
Have phone sex
Masturbate in front of your partner
Watch your partner masturbate
Visit a strip club
Perform a strip tease for your partner
Use restraints on your partner
Have your partner use restraints on you
Use a blindfold on your partner
Have your partner use a blindfold on you
Incorporate food into a sexual encounter
Wear provocative lingerie
Wear a costume during sex
Use a strap-on
Have your partner use a strap-on
Have sex with the lights on
Role-play a fantasy
Have sex outside of your bedroom
Come on your partner
Allow your partner to come on you
Once you’ve found some ideas that you’re both interested in, talk about how you might be able to incorporate them into your sex life. For the ones that you’re most interested in, tell your partner that you’ll take the lead with preparation (for example, you could buy the toy or book the hotel). Have your partner take the lead for the ideas he or she is most interested in. Or you can write your favorite ideas down on pieces of paper, then fold up the papers and put them in a jar. Pick one at random, and agree that you’ll do it that night.
Final Thoughts 💫: Remember, sexual passion is an ongoing, ever-evolving adventure. It’s about finding joy in the exploration—both of your own desires and of your partner’s. The more you talk, share, and explore, the deeper you’ll dive into what truly excites you. And hey, sometimes the best things in life happen when we allow ourselves to be a little playful, a little curious, and a lot open.
So go ahead—dare to discover something new, whether it's with yourself or with your partner. Because the only “normal” is the one that makes you feel free. Have fun exploring!